Welcome to the week in which we visit a semi-divey/ biker bar, and Ted orders an appetizer made from alligator. There’s a sentence I never thought I would type here.

Main Street Saloon is known for their burgers, which makes it even more unbelievable that somehow we’ve been doing this for 8+ years now and never picked this place for a Wednesday night out. Especially since they also have wings.

If you’ve been reading our blog for a bit now you know why that’s funny.

Anyway.

But at least, unlike some places we’ve been, they have other things, too. A lot of other things, actually. The menu is like eight pages, which is like a 300 page novel in the menu world. I mean, its not the Cheesecake Factory by any means, but if you’re newbies like us it will take you a hot minute to comb through things.

Aside from the usual bar food suspects like burgers, wings, assorted sandwiches and fried apps, they also have a whole section of appetizer egg rolls. Interesting. And then there’s the Mexican section with various tacos. Hmmm. The only thing I didn’t see was pizza. So no Italian night at Main Street Saloon, but as long as no one in the group has their heart set on that you can pretty much find something to please just about anyone.

Quick observation: the music selection on this particular night was about as eclectic as the menu. In the time it took us to get drinks and order food we heard two classic rock songs, Jason Aldean, something in the rap genre, and back to country. Stay tuned for more updates.

Back to the menu. If anyone in your group ever exclaims that they’re so hungry they could eat a five pound burger … well, bring them to Main Street Saloon, because they can get one – covered in cheese, bacon and BBQ sauce – for $60. Oh and fries, too. But if they eat it in 45 minutes or less it’s free. Hey, who doesn’t love a free dinner with a side of heart disease, no?

In the mood for something a bit fancier than a burger, but still want that rush of finishing a super sized meal on a time limit? Well you’re in luck, because they offer the same challenge but with a five pound steak! That one comes with fries or baked potato and a salad. So even those with an intolerance to gluten can still join in the fun! But make sure you call 24 hours in advance. No spontaneous gluttony here.

Main Street is also a big billiards bar. I mean, I wouldn’t call it a pool hall since there are only two tables, but I think we may have been the only group in the (somewhat crowded) place that wasn’t playing against someone or sitting with a member of their party who was involved in a game. And these are the kind of people who bring their own pool sticks to the bar. Fancy.

Music update: Kid Rock, followed by some vintage Elvis. *insert head scratching emoji here*

The server mentioned one of the specials was alligator nuggets, with meat that gets shipped in fresh from Louisiana, and that was all Ted needed to hear to be sold on that order.

And what goes better with alligator bites than a filet mignon sandwich. He said he ordered it partially because “it’s not something you see every day.”

Solid thought process.

He also commented this may be the most one single person has spent on a meal here ($15 for the alligator and $12 for the sandwich). Sadly there was no challenge for that particular arena.

I had to get a burger, since that’s the specialty here. I opted for the D’s Special, which has mushrooms, bacon and cheese. And I also got a side salad. Again, not a place I would normally order a salad, but if we’re getting alligator then why not?

Shane got the smothered burger.

And a coney dog.

And fried mushrooms. Which were so huge they were almost a meal all in themselves. There’s four in the basket, which I think we were visibly disappointed at first noticing, but then when we dug in and realized they’re each about the size of our burgers we felt redeemed.

Music update – Tom Petty, followed by OutKast’s So Fresh So Clean. What is happening here? Either someone is messing with us, or the battle for control of the jukebox may be about as fierce as the pool tables.

Ted said his filet mignon sandwich was just ok. The meat was tender and the flavor was good … but he said he’s had the Main Street burgers before (for lunch, chill out, we’re not breaking any rules here) and this sandwich wasn’t significantly better than those. But it was significantly more money. That math doesn’t seem right.

Shane just poured salt on that wound by attesting that his burger was very good. Now Shane may still be a bit salty (see what we did there?) about the time he was eating “healthy” with a taco salad and Ted sat across from him with a giant burger that dripped grease down his arm with every bite. But he did seem to enjoy this burger quite a bit. It was cooked the way he wanted (medium but still a bit pink inside – unlike the medium burger at the Rail that tried to – in his words – kill him). And he actually had to take a break before starting in on his coney dog.

Which he may have been better off not even eating, since it wasn’t at all his favorite part of the meal. He said he liked the toasted bun best, if that gives you any indication.

There was a lot of cheese – so that’s a big no to Ted ever ordering one – and the sauce was kind of sweet. Shane also said he prefers the meat in the coney sauce more minced up, whereas this was chunkier.

Side note, how do you talk about coney dogs this much and NOT make repeated “that’s what she said” jokes?

Hold up! Like a Virgin by Madonna was interrupted for someone else to play some System of a Down. Its like being back at one of those dueling piano bars when someone would give the guys on stage 10 bucks to play Piano Man for the 367th time that night and someone else would run up with a 50 just to get them to stop.

Also if you just read that last statement snd weren’t immediately transported back to Howl at the Moon in the Flats in the late 90s … well obviously we aren’t the same age. Or grew up in vastly different parts of Northeast Ohio. Because man that place was the spot back then. Do bars like that even exist still?

I digress.

Back to the present day. Here’s this week’s pro tip: they don’t say it loudly anywhere, but Main Street Saloon prefers cash. And by prefers, I mean that when you get your bill you’ll see that a 3.99% surcharge is added to credit or debit purchases. But there’s no place up until that point that screams this sentence out at you.

I mean for us this was like an extra $3.00. But still.

Mine and Shane’s total bill was $76.00. For four tequila sodas each, two burgers, a coney dog, a side salad and an appetizer.

Now I have to point out that Shane wouldn’t put the burger in his top five. He said it was good, and he would for sure eat a burger there again, but it wasn’t one of his faves. And since we all know how he likes to change his ratings on the regular, that says something that he wasn’t willing to bump any of his current “tops” for this one.

Which brings me to another pro tip: there are no sides with the burgers. So $9 may sound on the surface like a steal for a decent for a burger, but then if you want fries or a salad or anything along with it that’s $3-$4 additional.

The service at Main Street was very good. Ted said it was some of the best service we’ve had for a while. And we have had many, many times when we can’t even come close to saying that. The food came out fast, she was over from the bar often to check of we wanted more drinks, and she didn’t presumptuously bring over the bill as soon as we wiped the last crumbs off our faces.

Overall, will we be back? Yes. Was it a top pick? Probably not.

If we had to rate things on a scale of 1 (worst) to 5 (best)

Food: Ted 3️⃣ Shane 3️⃣ Steph 4️⃣

Stick to the burgers.

Service: Solid 4️⃣ across the board

Attentive and knowledgeable

Atmosphere: Ted 3️⃣ Shane 2️⃣ Steph 2️⃣

It’s a little cliquish and if you’re new it can be a touch intimidating. Plus the whole juke box oddity was like listening to someone’s private Spotify playlist they accidentally make public.

Value: Ted 2️⃣ Shane 4️⃣ Steph 3️⃣

I mean, we’re all for cheap bar food. Well, maybe not Ted, whose combined meal and appetizer was $32. That probably explains his score.

Overall: Ted 3️⃣ Shane 4️⃣ Steph 4️⃣

I mean, its worth a second visit, at least. If nothing else to fond out who else gets preempted from the jukebox.