Ooh, we’re fancy this week.

Well honestly we went from one extreme to the other, as Ted’s original pick was going to be The Workz in downtown Cuyahoga Falls. But when Ted arrived there he was told that the dining room was closed for a private party. We could’ve sat at the bar, but that was smack in the middle of the arcade area – which was brightly lit and full of arcade sounds. So he called an audible and picked Wise Guys instead.

Which is like fancy dining and kind of a throwback to the 50s. Like here’s some Sinatra with your velvet booths and mirrors on the wall with dim lighting.

Now full disclosure, Shane and I have been here before. We’ve had a couple of anniversary dinners here – including one in the early reopenings post COVID in which we spent a good three hours in the company of the other diners because the kitchen was understaffed and running wayyyyyy behind.

But anyway.

On this night we sat in the bar – because, well, that’s what we do. We have an aversion to a dining space if there is a perfectly good bar area – even one without televisions, gasp – as a separate option.

And also, we would’ve been the only people in the dining room, and we like company when we eat. Although upon entering the bar and observing the others seated there, it became obviously that the Wednesday night crowd at Wise Guys seems to be the very definition of “regulars.” Wednesdays are wine nights, and there appeared to be some tastings happening. Or just people who like to have a bartender uncork random bottles? Ok. I mean, you do you boo.

Mixed drinks all around at our table because they don’t serve draft beer. Oh the horror of Shane not being able to get a tall Bud Lite! He was on such a streak, too.

Now to be fair, he could’ve ordered it in a bottle, because the beer selection they do offer is pretty much a few bottled domestics. And scanning the selection, Bud Lite appears to be a top shelf name. Or, I guess it’s outranked by Blue Moon if you want to be extra fancy. Special occasions and such.

Speaking of fancy, that’s all the food is here. Don’t go expecting to get a wrap or a burger, because those don’t exist at Wise Guys. If you want that you need to go across the street to Gameday – which, spoiler alert, we did for drinks after our meals. It’s like night and day.

Ted and Shane both got steaks. Again, this wasn’t a cheap night out. Their steaks (which come with two sides) clock in at about $38 each. But Shane will tell you it’s one of the best steaks he’s ever had. Or, well, wait – we’ll come back to that in a minute.

Ted picked asparagus and angel hair pasta as his sides of choice. He said the pasta just had like an oil and butter sauce and was very good.

If he had any complaint it’s that he was still hungry when he left. Not because of the size of the steak, more so that he was just hungry in general and this meal wasn’t enough to fill that void.

Shane’s steak came with jojos and asparagus. He asked if the jojos were breaded and was just told “lightly seasoned “. But they looked breaded when they arrived. So the answer to that would be yes.

Learn from us, folks.

So Shane realized as the steak arrived that what he actually usually gets is the ribeye – and this was the strip steak. So the ribeye is the best steak he’s ever had. But he called that a weekend special occasion steak. The strip steak is a good “weekday choice,” but not his favorite of all time.

Noted.

I usually get a steak when we’ve come here – or pretty much anytime in general that we go to a steakhouse, because duh – it’s the specialty. But I wasn’t feeling like eating quite that heavy tonight (unlike some people, I don’t have a weekend and a weekday steak go-to. Just sayin). So I opted for the pork chop. It was $26, and also comes with two sides. I got the salad and a baked potato.

I had also been eyeing the pasta – the one with chicken, shrimp and sausage in a vodka sauce – because also being an Italian based restaurant that was sure to be good. Someday I’ll have to try that option. But today wasn’t that day.

I was happy with my choice, though. The pork chop was good. It had decent flavor and wasn’t dry.

The service was … weird. Like the server literally hovered at the back of the row waiting for us to sit and settle in before she came back over to ask about drinks. Um, yeah – there are mirrors everywhere. We see you. It’s like the service industry equivalent to putting the phone on hold while you pretend to go look for someone you know isn’t going to take the call.

Which would imply that it would be good service if they’re literally just waiting for you to sit so they can wait on you, right? Nope. It was hit or miss after that. Like sometimes our drinks were empty for some time, and sometimes she was right on asking us what we needed. And let’s be clear, it was not busy in the place. One or two other tables max in the bar, and I don’t think anyone in the dining room. And the regulars who appeared to be conducting their own private wine tasting at the bar don’t really count because food was certainly an afterthought with that group.

Overall this is definitely one of those places that’s a throwback to days gone by. From the decor to the menu to the service – it’s all a little too swanky for our Wednesday night tastes, but it’s fine if you want to celebrate a special occasion or be a little fancy. The food is good and worth the price tag. But maybe don’t go if you also want to watch the big game, or any television at all for that matter. Unless you want to excuse yourself to run across the street to Gameday to check the score every so often. Grab a Bud Lite while you’re there.